An Open Letter to My Father

I'm taking over Shara's blog for a bit, and didn't want to wait until Father's Day to do this. I've been thinking a lot about my father, Bob, and knew that I'd never be able to speak these words but want him to know how I feel. So for the people who want to read about Shara, normal postings will return shortly!

When I was little, I was so proud to be "Bobby's daughter". Everyone knew you from Gershon's but now that I'm older, I realize they thought so much of you because of your generosity and love of life.

Some things you've taught me:

You would say that sometimes people came into the deli looking for money and you'd be more than happy to give them a sandwich or other food, but you'd never give out money because you didn't know what it would be used for. Ever since you told me that, I've tried to make it a habit to have food available for handouts instead of money. I try to remember to buy extra at the market to put in the food pantry collection boxes. I carry extra granola bars in case someone is in need.

Your work ethic is legendary. Growing up it never occurred to me that I'd actually retire. Even while I continue to work and put money into my retirement, the thought of sitting around relaxing, doesn't sound like it could every be a reality. I still think I'll work until I drop dead.
When we're not feeling great, Jill and I always think of you saying, "when you don't feel like you can go any farther, you reach back and grab that little bit of strength you have left and puuullll it forward". Yup - Shara hasn't gotten that amount of fortitude yet, but I keep trying! Come on Shara, you can do it - just reach back and pull. Some day!

Tolerance - this comes from both you and mom. I'm not sure if it's because you were brought up Jewish during/just following WWII, but I think it has a lot to do with that. We've talked about this a bit before, but your openness and acceptance of others has been the most important value you've given me (I believe). It's kept my mind open to all sorts of people but also experiences and ideas. Having an open mind that's comfortable with new ideas, leads to change and change is so important if you want to go anywhere or fix things that are wrong, or just make things better.

Love of food - hey, this is important. I was brought up to love good food and appreciate art and music. I know it's because these things were in our home for as long as I can remember. The Barbara Streisand  records from Columbia House and all those musicals! We've been sharing lots of musicals with Shara and want her to grow up surrounded by music too. There are many times I've thought of you as I put on my opera voice when singing with/to Shara - Sundays of you serenading me with Three Dog Night and the Spinners (right?).

So maybe this "letter" is also a reflection of how you've influenced me. It's never been easy for me to talk with you about feelings. We have fun and interesting conversations but nothing too heavy. That's fine because we know we love each other (and I believe you take your holiday cards very seriously), but I've never taken the time to let you know just how much I love you and how happy I am that you've influenced me in so many positive ways. It took a while for me to grow up, but now that I am, I can certainly appreciate how much of a hand you've had in who I am today.
Love you dad!

-Laurie

We went to Sheep Pasture today so Shara could show us where her class picked up and examined  roly poly beetles. We trekked around for a bit and finally Shara spotted not the same log they gathered specimens, but another log with the tell-tale signs of  roly poly activity - holes around the log where the beetles ate through. Really cool that she was able to spot these. When we were cleaning last week, we found her insect collecting jar - the top is a magnifying glass, and she immediately said that we had to go to Sheep Pasture to find the roly polies. Glad we were able to do that - and what a gorgeous day to go - cool, sunny, and the Azaleas were all in bloom. Beautiful! Ended with some ice cream at Daddy's Dairy and back home for a shower to get off all the grungy dirt and dust - had taken a quick trip to the Geocache beforehand to replace the wet things inside. Someone must not have shut it carefully and everything was reported as soaked. There were several dirt bikers out, and even though they're very respectful of walkers, there's still a good deal of dust about.

Last night we were at church for the goods and services auction. Shara read her book until more kids arrived and then she wanted me to bring her down and couldn't kick me out fast enough. Apparently she's rather comfortable hanging out with the kids at church and had a great time watching movies and doing whatever else kids do!

Pool

Today we played pool for the first time in years. It was a nice family activity and not too long ago I would have very reluctant to play with shara because i'd be scared she would blow, but she didn't and we all had fun. Yesterday we all got into spring cleaning mode. Shara almost finished clearing out her kitchen and will soon begin using it for art supplies . I may even get my bakers rack back!

Girls' Day Out

It was all about eating, as usual. We went to the first show of Mirror Mirror. At home we popped corn on the cob in the microwave, in a paper bag. I know we're not supposed to being in food, but it's so much better than what we'd get at the theater. Shara requested butter and salt on hers. I melted the butter in a zip lock bag, then added the popped corn, tossed, added some salt, and she ate about a 1/2 gallon's worth. I loved it just plain. On the way to the movie, Shara continued to listen and read Harry Potter and the Sorcerer's Stone. We were one of five cars in the lot so we didn't worry about getting tickets. The movie was really fun for both of us. My eyes were covered for me during the one kiss, but other than we laughed quite a bit.

After the movie we headed to 5 Guys Burgers and Fries. Shara had a small bacon cheeseburger with no toppings. I had a small hamburger with lettuce, tomato, pickles, grilled onions, and mustard. We split a regular fry and had plenty to bring home to daddy. Shara also wrapped up the little bit of burger she had left. At dinner, when he ate it, she said, "I wrapped it myself and smashed it." We dropped off the fries to the car and headed over to Hilliard's in the hot April heat. I asked her if she was going to really eat a whole scoop because if she didn't, I'd be finishing it and she said she would. We both knew I didn't want to eat it but would because I have no will-power. She ate about 1/4 of the scoop and yes, I finished it. Hers was much better than mine. Their frozen yogurt would be perfect if it weren't for the bit of tang (yogurt flavor). Not all froyo has it, but this does. The coffee flavor was strong and the toffee mix-in was their candy, so of course it was great. I shared my marshmallow topping, but she didn't want any of the hot fudge. Shara got the Cookies and Cookie Dough - "We make our cookie dough from scratch, we couldn't bring ourselves to use commercial frozen dough pellets found in other ice cream." Topped with chocolate jimmies too - and these are real chocolate - crunchy flakes, of very chocolaty chocolate. The woman put a very large spoonful in the bottom of the cup and topped it with at least 2 more spoonfuls. I really enjoyed this and need to remember next time. But I probably won't. I'll ask Shara to remind me.

Then we went to the market and needed to pick up a challah because this is the closest market where they get really good, traditional challah - from a bakery in Brookline. Then we got into the hot car and headed home. Shara then spent the next 2 1/2 hours! reading/listening to more Harry Potter. She's now up to chapter 12. After we left her room for her to go to sleep, I hear her calling me. I went in and she tells me she's scared because of Harry Potter. I told her she shouldn't read it anymore if it's too scary. She assured me it's only when reading at night. She asked if she could sleep with me and when I said I wasn't going to bed yet, she asked if I could come get her when I did go to bed. I'm guessing she's been asleep for a while now.

She's Addicted

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Shara guarding the castle

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Wake up!

Alan helped shara set up the alarm on her phone to get her up at 6:10. Not sure why so early but she's the student of the week and had to do a few things to prep for it in the mornings. She likes to make sure she gets in her tv time. I also think she may want to exercise with me. Theres a dance exercise she made up that she wants to teach me. If it's like whati saw the other night, it will indeed be a good workout.

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Happy Passover

I'm very fortunate to have a job that lets me take days off when wanted and since Shara had Good Friday off of school and it was Erev Pasach, we were able to make the short trip to Bubbe's for the seder. We had to first make a stop at Jumpin' Jack's for lunch. We split a fish dinner - Shara had the fries, I had the onions rings and we split the rest. We made a good team. Ice cream followed, but not too much because we knew dessert was coming later. Shara's very good at making decisions and I had to talk her into getting a bit of ice cream. I am not good at limiting myself, but we both got kiddie size and that was just right.

We got to Bubbe's and helped set the table and get ready for the sedar. We did take a little time out of the work to run around and play Frisbee. Shara's getting really good at it - it's actually fun playing with her now. She really likes to run so we had some races and got a little silly trying to race the Frisbee and actually coming close to catching it when the wind sent it back toward us. Having an alarm on my phone is great because I didn't need to keep thinking about the time and before we knew it, it was time to go back in. Shara was able to keep busy the rest of the time on her phone and filling out her Student of the Week poster. Her favorite thing to do at home is "play with my dad" and we talked about giving ourselves more time to play together in the morning when we're home with each other and not watch so much tv.

Everyone came close to 6 PM and good thing because Shara kept asking every 15 minutes when everyone was going to get there. She couldn't wait to see her little cousins (and big cousins). She loved playing with Holly, and being able to pick her up was the best. When I asked if she still wanted a little sister she said yes, then changed to mostly. Holly is so cute but can be a handful. She's got a ton of energy and no fear. Basically a smart, funny three-year-old, but not easy, that's for sure. She kept Shara quite busy! She also loved the bear Shara made for her. Shara found the instructions for the bear online and we went to the craft store to get the supplies, but other than that, she did most of it on her own and it came out great. I wish I took a picture.

We didn't leave Bubbe's until close to 11 PM and got to Jill's soon after. Going to be wasn't a problem! We both slept well, not getting up until we were ready and then relaxed and visited until we all (minus Samantha who had a coffee date) left for the Country Drive-In. More onion rings, more bacon and ice cream. Certainly not a very good Passover meal, but just right for a trip back home. It was great - no traffic and I listened, Shara watched the Muppet Show, disc 2.

On to Easter - the eggs have been boiled and we're trying to make our own natural eggs. We'll see. The process itself is fun - going around the yard, inspecting various leaves. Hopefully we'll be able to get moving early enough tomorrow morning to do the dying.

Now you see her...

Last Friday was the Ice Cream Social at school. This is an annual event and much loved by all the kids. In the past, Shara pretty much stayed with one of us and played with her friends very close by. In fact, year 1 she was glued to us most of the evening. Well this year was a totally different story. Now that she's a big second grader, we're finding her comfort level has increased quite a bit. It was hard to even know where she was most of the night and she had to be reminded that, "no we don't go to the playground without asking your parents, without a grown-up, and especially when it's almost dark out."

So what I realized from this evening is we're not actually sharing as many experiences with Shara as we used to. At least not directly enough to generate the detailed blog postings. That's not to say we don't do things together, but often Shara's more on her own, like at the social. Or the other evening we went to the Raynham Public Library to hear the Barn Goats, a jazz band of members from our church. My work and private life are certainly converging in strange ways! Most of the night Shara hung out by either Alan or myself, playing on her phone. But then I was able to bring her downstairs to see what the other kids were doing and ended up leaving her while she played truth or dare or some other dangerous game. She certainly had a good time and didn't want to leave, but exactly what she did isn't clear. Nothing was broken, but I seem to think coffee drinking happened. Good thing it was decaf!

Sunday we had church and Shara volunteered to be the star of a reenactment we did in class of the Good Samaritan. She hammed it up, doing a good job of moaning as the hurt traveler. Then she wanted to be the director and we had to have a talk on the way home, where I ended up hurting her feelings and had to explain that teaching is my job and I have certain rules I have to follow and she can't act like the teacher, etc. All was ok after a bit. She got upset just as I pulled up to the gas pump and I had to leave the conversation, which was good because it gave me time to think of a way to explain why she couldn't be the teacher/boss. When I got back in the car, she had put tissues on her eyes, under her glasses and put her hands over her ears and started humming. I guess she didn't want to hear what I had to say, but she eventually did and all was well.
She spent the rest of the day, and a bit too late into the evening, at Oma and Jidor's while Alan and I went to the Hunger Games and out to dinner.

cute pic of daddy and Shara

Shara got her hair cut a few weeks ago and they made a pretty braid